I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
