okay pat passed out under dana's car
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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