I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize