Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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