Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
