he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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