kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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