i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
