Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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