break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
