absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Randomize
