Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
