Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
