one might say we're banned from that church
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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