How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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