dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
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