they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
