so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
