It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Randomize
