i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
