her vagine was all disorganized.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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