the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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