Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
You're a waste of cheezeits
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
