we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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