who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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