They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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