remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize