i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize