...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
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When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
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theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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