You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
