the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I'm sobbing to NWA
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
