Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
