Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
