I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
