i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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