walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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