I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
