plz talk dirty to me
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
