Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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