just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
