Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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