honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Drake has all the answers
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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