If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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