I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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