He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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