we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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