Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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