Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?