I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize