Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
