My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
