im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
